As one of the ladies here at the Chicken Ranch Brothel in Pahrump Nevada, I think I speak for all the courtesans when I say - we miss dating. A lot of us girls don't have boyfriends because we are too busy pleasing you. Plus, we just get so exhausted from all the mind blowing sex we have while giving you the Girlfriend Experience, we're too tired to go out and date afterwards. I know dating can be stressful and frustrating at times, but that doesn't mean we don't miss it. The struggle is real! Ladies have needs too. For one day only on April 1st, we are asking that you sexy men take care of us.
We want to have the Boyfriend Experience.
How exactly would that go down, you ask?
Let's see, we can start out with a hot and steamy shower. I'll suds up your body while you complain about how messy my bathroom is. Yes, I do need three hair brushes, and yes, it really turns me on when you roll your eyes over my makeup collection. Don't forget to leave the toilet seat up on your way out. I've been looking forward to falling in when I make a middle of the night visit.
Oh yeah, I'm getting wet already.
When you first come into my room, please remark at how "overly girlie" it is and how it needs a "man's touch." Feel free to bring your NFL memorabilia with you to spruce up the place. Bring that beer sign you stole from the local bar while you were in college with you too. I've been meaning to add a bit of testosterone to the decor.
Before we start fooling around, I'd really like you to fix my problems. I know women keep saying that we just want you to listen... that's a lie. When I tell you about some drama at work, or how my mom insulted me again, please give me some pointers on how to handle it. I especially love it when you say things like "You just have to..."
Speaking of my mom, I'm just like her aren't I? Sure, you've never met my actual mom, but if you just tell me that I'm turning into her, I'll automatically correct all of my behaviors. Yup. It's that easy. Also, can I ask you to do something for me, just once? And when I do, can you call me a "nag?" I just love it when you talk dirty to me.
We can bring some food into the bedroom if you'd like. You can turn me into a sundae. Whipped cream, chocolate sauce, and my cherry on top. Just make sure you comment on how much I'm eating. I wouldn't want to lose this gorgeous figure I've got.
Have your dessert quickly though. I'd like to keep the foreplay to a minimum so we can get to the main act.
After we've had the most orgasm-inducing, world-rocking, mind-blowing sex of both of our lives, can you just roll over and go right to sleep? This cuddling is so overrated. I know you're expecting me to want to talk, but really, I just want to eat a sandwich and go to sleep for a few hours. Oh, bonus points if you snore. I mean, really get it into it. I've always said that sleeping next to someone should be a challenge.
Oh and when you leave, would you mind taking my car for an oil change? I know, I should've done it months ago, but I've just been so busy doing... you.
The life of a courtesan can be challenging and thankless at times. Having a Boyfriend Experience would really go a long way to showing us ladies just how much we mean to you. We ladies only like BFE one day a year- April 1st. The rest of the year it is GFE all the way!